The
Science of Attachment
By Kelley Shirazi
As parents, we
hear it all the time: “Don't pick up the baby every time
she cries. You'll spoil her!”
“Get him
on a schedule.”
“You'll just
have to let her cry it out. It's the only way she'll learn to
sleep on her own.”
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The overwhelming
theme of American parenting today is the fostering of independence,
featuring methods that encourage the separation of parents and
their children. Grandparents, pediatricians, nurses and daycare
providers all have volumes to speak on the subject. Techniques
such as sleep training, scheduled feedings and "crying it
out" all focus on easing the burden on parents, integrating
children into their parents' lives and schedules. To family-centered
parents, all this advice can seem confusing and counter-intuitive.
The good news for
"attached parents" is that there is now hard science
to back up more intuitive ways of parenting. Attachment parenting
(AP) is really nothing new. It's simply the art of responsive
parenting, advocating techniques such as co-sleeping, babywearing,
breastfeeding, bonding at birth and a belief in the language value
of babies' cries. In scientific circles, this is known as "dyadic
attunement." And while the majority of scientific literature
focuses on the mother-infant connection, as noted pediatrician
Dr. William Sears says, this attunement certainly extends to fathers
as well.
AP from
a biological perspective
From late pregnancy through the second year of life, your baby's
brain goes through a huge growth spurt, concentrating on right
brain development. The right brain is deeply connected to both
the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems, which control
vital functions that support survival and coping with stress.
The right brain is also connected to the limbic
System1, where emotions reside, and the
hippocampus and amygdala, which are closely tied to memory and
emotional regulation.2
In response to
the old "nature vs. nurture" question, we've discovered
that the human cerebral cortex adds 70 percent of its final DNA
content after birth. This demonstrates that brain development
is influenced by both biology and environment.3
Studies have found evidence that stress and trauma impair optimal
brain development, while healthy attachment promotes
it.4,5 Healthy attachment is the result
of "tuning in" to your child, known scientifically in
attachment theory as "attunement."
So how exactly
can you achieve attunement? That's easy! Just follow your baby's
cues. Babies have their own secret language, communicated through
expression. When you pay attention to these expressions and respond
to them, you're communicating an understanding of your baby's
thoughts and feelings.
All stressed
out
Understanding and responding to your baby's cues alleviates her
stress, freeing more precious brain space to allow for positive,
learning experiences.6 Babies whose parents
are not attuned to their needs become stressed, and stressed babies
operate in survival mode, dedicating all their resources to the
basic functions necessary for existence and minimizing the
opportunities for growth.7
The biological
reactions to stress are phenomenal. The brain releases stress
hormones, which in turn trigger a hypermetabolic state in the
brain.8 Prolonged exposure to stress causes
the release of high levels of thyroid hormones and vasopressin9,
a hypothalamic neuropeptide that can induce nausea and vomiting10.
(Have you ever seen a baby who's thrown up after
crying?)
The results of
stress exposure include dissociation with numbing, avoidance,
compliance and lack of reaction.11 Stressed
babies try to restore equilibrium but cannot. The biochemical
alterations going on in their rapidly developing brains have long-lasting
effects.12
Keep in mind that
periods of misattunement will always occur. As long as these periods
are brief, they actually provide a positive learning experience
for infants, teaching resilience and building trust that reattunement
will soon follow. These cycles of misattunement and reattunement
may form the foundation of the concept of empathy for children.13
Healthy attachment is the key to healthy babies, and healthy babies
are the key to healthy adults.
New approaches
from new facts
When you come up against "baby trainers" who discourage
attunement techniques and advocate building independence, try
to keep in mind that they're doing the best they can with the
information they have -- or had. New knowledge points to new conclusions
and when you know better, you do better. No matter how you choose
to parent your children, there will always be someone who disagrees.
Armed with both
intuition and hard science, you have the opportunity to explore
and choose from many different methods of parenting. In the end,
what's most important is that parents treat children as individuals
with inherent dignity and love. The rest will work itself out!
1. A.N. Schore, "The Effects of Early Relational
Trauma on Right Brain Development, Affect Regulation and Infant
Mental Health," Infant Mental Health Journal 22, 1-2 (2001):
201-269
2. A.N. Schore, "Dysregulation of the Right Brain: A Fundamental
Mechanism of Traumatic Attachment and the Psychopathogenesis of
Posttraumatic Stress Disorder," Australian and New Zealand
Journal of Psychiatry 36 (2002): 9-30
3. J. Lipari, "First Impressions Count with Your Newborn:
Early Months Time for Emotional, Cognitive Development,"
Boston Herald (Aug. 27, 2000)
4. 4. A.N. Schore, "The Effects of Early Relational Trauma
on Right Brain Development, Affect Regulation and Infant Mental
Health," Infant Mental Health Journal 22, 1-2 (2001): 201-269
5. A.N. Schore, "Effects of a Secure Attachment Relationship
on Right Brain Development, Affect Regulation, and Infant Mental
Health," Infant Mental Health Journal 22, 1-2 (2001): 7-66
6. A.N. Schore, "The Effects of Early Relational Trauma on
Right Brain Development, Affect Regulation and Infant Mental Health,"
Infant Mental Health Journal 22, 1-2 (2001): 201-269
7. A.N. Schore, "The Effects of Early Relational Trauma on
Right Brain Development, Affect Regulation and Infant Mental Health,"
Infant Mental Health Journal 22, 1-2 (2001): 201-269
8. M.R. Brown, "Corticotropin-releasing Factor: Actions on
the Sympathetic Nervous System and Metabolism," Endocrinology
111 (1982): 928-931
9. A.N. Schore, "Affect Regulation and the Origin of the
Self: The Neurobiology of Emotional Development" (Mahwah,
NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum, 1994)
10. A.N. Schore, "Dysregulation of the Right Brain: A Fundamental
Mechanism of Traumatic Attachment and the Psychopathogenesis of
Posttraumatic Stress Disorder," Australian and New Zealand
Journal of Psychiatry 36 (2002): 9-30
11. A.N. Schore, "Affect Regulation and the Origin of the
Self: The Neurobiology of Emotional Development" (Mahwah,
NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum, 1994)
12. A.N. Schore, "Affect Regulation and the Origin of the
Self: The Neurobiology of Emotional Development" (Mahwah,
NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum, 1994)
13. R. Carroll, UK Council for Psychotherapy, "An Interview
with Allan Schore: ‘The American Bowlby’" (conducted
by telephone), 2001
Kelley Shirazi’s
interest in natural health and nutrition started in college, when
she studied herbology and holistic health along with her women’s
studies major. After graduation,
she created Oceana Botanical Herbal Products, a line of petrochemical-
and alcohol-free personal care and baby care products. A
passionate advocate of organic, hormone-free foods, Kelley is
currently studying toward her master’s of science degree
in holistic nutrition. She lives in Oregon with her husband and
daughter.
