The Teen Years: Setting Limitlessness

As any parenting book will tell you, raising a child is all about setting boundaries. This is the time they get up, this is the time they go to bed, and oh they BETTER be back by curfew! Though of course these types of limits are what keep our kids safe and learning about how to live a responsible life, some parents seem to forget that allowing their children to realize that the outside world is without boundaries is important too.

I'm not about to suggest that you let your child stay out at all hours of the night or that he or she can skip out of school any time they like. Here is how you can begin to teach your child that the world is truly without boundaries and is what ever they make of it.

Discover their Interests

Ever been around a parent of a teenager who is going on and on about how little Ginny wants to be a veterinarian, only to then have 14 year old Ginny interrupt her mom and tell her she'd like to be an artist instead? All too many of us parents of teens tend to give up if our child doesn't answer a question we ask the first time.

It's time for us parents to toughen up a bit, not take things too personally, and to continue to show interest and curiosity in our child's life – no matter HOW many times our attempts at talking with them are shot down.

Show Them What They Can Do

Teenagers have so many interests and ideas, but they lack the wisdom and experience to know what to do with it. That's where you, mom and dad, step in. Say you are Ginny's parent and just discovered she wants to be an artist. Ask her out to a modern art exhibit and let her see what it'd take to be a serious artist for a living. Look into graphic art programs and how she can build her own business. Heck, why not check out some tattoo parlors and ask some tattoo artists how they got started?

Let Them Know they can Change Their Mind

Do you remember how much pressure you may have felt from your parents to “be” a certain something? Many children will actually enter into post secondary education and take courses based on their parents' desires rather than their own. Always remind your child that you respect their life as their own, and that their choices are just that: their choices. You will always be there to back them up and offer as much help as you can, but at the end of the day, what they do with their lives is all up to them.

photo by Adrian Boca