Potty Learning 1-2-3
By Carrie Lauth
Ah, potty training! Go to a local bookseller and
you will find dozens of books on the subject. Search the ‘net and there are thousands
of web sites with information on how to do it stress-free. There
are even people who are capitalizing on a parent's frustration with
potty training by offering to do it for you for a hefty sum! I honestly
can't imagine anything more unseemly than paying someone to teach
my child to "go."
I have successfully potty trained two out of three kids so far;
baby number three is only 14 months, so she is off the hook for
a few months at least. I seem to be the envy of the playgroups
when other moms see that my 3-year-old son has been in whitey-tighties
for over a year. My oldest was also 2 when he potty learned.
Begin at the start for the best potty learning
For me, potty training starts with a newborn. Now don't get me
wrong -- I do diaper my babes, but I have always used cloth diapers,
which encourage babies to train early. I'm not a longhaired, barefoot,
off-the-grid hippie (not that there's anything wrong with that,
but you're more likely to find me in Doc Martens than Birkenstocks!),
yet I have been cloth diapering since the beginning.
It has saved me hundreds of dollars, but I also like the fact
that my babies begin to make the association with the uncomfortable
wet feeling and the knowledge that they can prevent it. Most
babies
will wake up dry in the morning at several months of age, demonstrating
that they are physically able to "hold it." Many moms
have said that their cloth-diapered babies potty learn several
months earlier than disposable-diapered babies.
The basic recipe for potty training success
Even if you choose not to cloth diaper, you can use Grandma's recipe
(and I do owe it to my mother, like most of the good stuff I know
about parenting) for easy potty training.
Let your baby come into the bathroom when you go. That way, they
know what's going on in there. You don't have to get graphic, just
talk to them about what toilets are for. If you are a woman at
home all day with boy children, encourage Daddy to show 'em how
it's done. You don't want them thinking that if they go on the
toilet their equipment will fall off, like Mum's obviously did.
Strange, but true -- some tots will come to this conclusion.
Buy three or four of those cheap little molded plastic potties and
put them around the house, at least one in each bathroom and one
in the kitchen or the room where you spend the most time with your
child. If your child is a boy, stick a towel underneath, for the
sake of your carpet. Speaking of boys -- you can take advantage of
nature here by keeping an open mind. I know at least one boy who
was trained when his mom let him go off the side of the deck.
The summer that your child is closest to two, take two days and
don't leave the house. Let your child run around naked from the waist
down, with a big tee shirt on top so that private parts stay private.
Every 10 minutes, place the child
matter-of-factly on the pot. Do not ask insane questions
like "Do you need to go potty, sweetie pie?" We are
talking about dealing with a two-year-old here! Just do it like
it's the thing to do, and don't ask permission. Don't force it,
and if she wants to get up right away, let her. If you have a
resistant child, set a timer to go off every 10 minutes. It's
amazing what a child will do when the power dynamic is taken away.
When the "potty timer" goes off, it's time to sit on
the pot!
Use praise, but don't go overboard. Act like this
is the expected thing. Be cool. Say "You put pee pee in the
potty, just like Mommy and Daddy (and big brother, and your older
play group friend
... third parties are gold here!) do.”
Don't make a big deal out of what's happening. Don't spend hours
reading potty training books or videos to the child. Again, be cool.
If you make it into a big deal, your child will be more likely to
dig in and resist.
Have some "big boy shorts"
or "big girl panties" that you know your child will
like during potty training, perhaps that you have picked out together,
ready for the end of the two days. Your child will be less likely
to have accidents if s/he is going to mess up their new undies.
When the inevitable accidents happen,
don't scold. Be patient and gracious during potty learning. This
is part of the job. Remember that if you decide to spring for
carpet cleaning, you will still come out ahead if you don't have
to buy diapers for another year or two!
© Carrie Lauth
Carrie is a work-from-home mom
of three, a homebirth advocate, breastfeeding counselor and homeschooler.
In her free time, she enjoys a good book and anything involving
espresso. Visit her web site www.Lauth.biz.
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